Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Reality Trip

Not to sound like a jet-setter or anything, but yes, I did just get back from Hawaii and yes, I'm going to write about it. A quick overview on why I went: My dad is an Ironman triathlete. In case you've never heard of this (and trust me, I do not think any less of you if you haven't) the Ironman triathalon is the hardest tri race in the world. It is a 2.4 mile swim, 114 mile bike ride, and then, a MARATHON. You know, only 26.2 miles and miles and miles of running.
If you think you'd have to be insane to want to do this race... you would be absolutely correct. That is a minimum requirement, actually.
Now, the World Championship Ironman is in Kona, Hawaii. It is the same race, only through Hawaiian size waves, over blacktop surrounded by petrified lava, in the hot sun and fierce winds. To do this particular Ironman, you must qualify, which means you must be in the top 2 or 3 of your entire age group in another Ironman race. Kona is only for the toughest, most competitive, and craziest people who participate in this sport.

My dad is one of them. He set this goal for himself years ago and, this weekend, achieved it.

So, of course, my entire family goes to support him and (incidentally of course) get a trip to Hawaii out of the whole spectacle.
All caught up? You with me? Awesome. Moving on.

Many people say that they love NY because of how real it is. No one tries to sugarcoat anything, it's where you're forced to prove yourself in the 'real' world, and when you see a bum pooping in a box, you think life doesn't get any more real than that.
This is certainly what I thought when I first moved here 5 (holycraphaveIreallybeenhere5years) years ago, and up until recently, I kept that in my head. But through looking at myself and meeting a wonderful person on my trip, I now have a very different point of view.

In NYC, besides money, one of the top commodities a person can have is wit. Cleverness. The ability to quickly and intelligently make fun of anything, and make anyone laugh. Wit can, and totally is, used to cover insecurity, loneliness, any number of emotional ailments that NY hands out to its loyal members so abundantly, along with the flu and common cold.
Mostly everyone tries to use wit in public, and as a result, mostly everyone comes into a conversation, especially when meeting people for the first time, with a layer of skepticism and cynicism that is almost impenetrable. Constantly looking for double meanings and sarcasm, not trusting for a moment that this person is being at all genuine; because, really, who is?

Oh wait, that's right! Not everyone lives in NY! There are places outside these 5 buroughs, where people say what they mean and are allowed to be who they are without trying to be who they are in the most fashionable and ironic sense. Places like... Hawaii maybe?

My sister and I went on a spiritual (among other things) journey together in Hawaii before race day, and at the start of this journey we met two young men and they decided to come along with us. Me being the hard, toughened NYer that I am, and watching out for my little sister in addition to myself, I was instantly on my guard and my bullshit detector was cranked up to an 11 out of 10.
So when one of the young men started going on about saving butterflies and absorbing energy, and literally was stopping to smell flowers, I was certain this was a whole carefully constructed act to make the big city girl loosen up her morals and legs on her amazing Hawaii vacation to the mysterious, yoga-tastic boy with the sandy blonde wind-blown hair and deep blue-green eyes.
Hey, I never said positive energy was the only thing he had going for him.

It took a whole day for me to realize that this guy wasn't bullshitting, and after that, that he wasn't just plain crazy. He was simply saying what he thought and felt. Without giving a thought to what other people might think of it. And this attitude had a deep effect on me. I began to lose my 3rd eye. Not my true 3rd eye to wisdom and clarity, but my fake 3rd eye that is always watching everything I do from an outsiders point of view. I did things like jumping on a wall and climbing a tree, not because I thought it would look like I was a free spirit, but just because it was fun and felt good to use my muscles.

It's been a while since that happened. Longer than I'd care to admit.

I had to go all the way to Hawaii to find someone who was real; who allowed me to experience something real. And while people in NY may laugh their superior laugh, this man is braver than all of them, because he is who he is, and is not afraid to be beautiful.

It's a lesson we can all benefit from.

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