So today was the day I was supposed to be flying home to Miami for the first time since May. Was going to see Stef tonight, Nikki and Luke tomorrow, Maria and Em monday, and whoever else after. I was going to fly home tonight and have one night of Chanuka with my family- a day late by the way- and watch their faces as they opened my presents. A family night, in my childhood home, with the weather a good 50 degrees above NYC.
But, alas motherfucking alas.
No sooner did I give my official goodbye (changing my status on facebook of course) then I found out my flight was cancelled because of the huge blizzard that has taken over the northeast for the next 15 hours. I got back from the airport about 10 minutes ago, it has just now started to snow, and I don't think it's going to stop for a very very long time. And the kicker: I was supposed to leave yesterday, but I delayed leaving for one day because of a possible callback that I didn't even get. Go figure.
As I watch the little, cute, almost fuzzy flurries of snow, individually they look so benign. So innocent and gentle, blown away with the smallest puff of wind and melting as soon as they hit your tongue. And as I watch there are more and more and more of them, they never hit the ground hard, but layer upon gentle layer, they are the one thing besides and alien or terrorist attack that can stop this most bustling of cities. It won't last long, but by morning this city will be calm and quiet, under a spell and transformed into a sleeping Disney princess of your choice.
Although it snowed a few weeks ago for about 5 minutes, this is the first official, stick-to-the-sidewalk snow of the year. And every year the first snow makes me think back onto my FIRST first NY snow. Just like these small snowflakes shut down life as we know it, at least for a day or so, the event that I connect with that long-ago snow has had such an effect on my life. It was one of those moments that made me who I am today. If everything that night had not happened exactly as it did, I would be a different person. That was planned, this new snow is unwelcome, but they both have the same effect. Something small radiating outward to become huge.
I guess there is no real point to this blog, except that no matter how welcome or unexpected, everything happens for a reason. You might not know what it is now, and you might never, but be assured that it does. I'll get home on monday, I'll still have my chanuka, and I'll still have my family and friends.
And tonight, I think the universe wanted me to make a snow angel. I'd better get to it.
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